How You Can Live a Normal Life with Herpes

Being diagnosed with herpes can bring up a lot of strong emotions. It’s normal to feel anxious or embarrassed at first, but these feelings often fade over time as people learn more about the virus and discover that they aren’t alone. Most people with herpes live completely normal lives and can maintain healthy relationships.

Herpes infections are very common. An estimated 50 to 80 percent of adults in the U.S. have oral herpes, and roughly 1 in 6 people ages 14 to 49 have genital herpes. Herpes simplex virus (HSV) is not deadly and rarely causes serious health problems. While it isn’t curable, many people never experience symptoms and there are multiple treatment options available to help manage outbreaks.

Read on to learn what to expect after an HSV diagnosis and discover helpful tips for living and dating with herpes.

• Understanding Herpes
• How to deal with your first few outbreaks
• Prioritize Your Mental Health
• Engage in Open Communication with Any Sexual Partne
• Breaking the Stigma

Understanding Herpes

What do I do if I find out I have herpes? You may know the facts about herpes. Herpes is a common viral infection caused by the herpes simplex viruses HSV-1 and HSV-2. HSV-1 is typically responsible for cold sores around the mouth and lips, and is often contracted through nonsexual contact like kissing. HSV-2 is mostly spread through sexual contact and usually leads to genital herpes. However, HSV-1 can also cause genital herpes when spread to the genitals through oral sex.

Both viruses can cause painful sores, but they also lie dormant in nerve cells and can reactivate later in life. Regardless of the type, with the right care and consideration, outbreaks can be managed, and people living with herpes can still live normal, happy lives.

Herpes is common,About two-thirds of people under the age of 50 are infected with HSV-1, while around one in eight people aged 14-49 carry HSV-2.

Herpes is non-life-threatening, and can include a healthy and romantic sex life! With open communication, proper understanding, and effective herpes management, a fulfilling sex life with herpes is totally achievable.

How to deal with your first few outbreaks

What do I do if I find out I have herpes? You may deal with your first herpes outbreak. There is currently no cure for herpes, but there are treatment options that can help improve symptoms and reduce the risk of spreading the virus. Even if you aren’t experiencing any symptoms, you should still ask your doctor about possible treatment options.

Symptoms can vary depending on which areas of your body are affected and the type of virus you have. If you experience symptoms at all, they will likely be more severe after the initial infection than they are during recurring outbreaks. The most common symptoms to expect include

• Sores around the genitals, rectum, or mouth (genital herpes)
• Blisters or cold sores around the mouth (oral herpes)
• Fever and other flu-like symptoms (during initial outbreak only)
• Small bumps that resemble an ingrown hair or pimple (genital herpes)

While there is no cure for herpes, treatment can shorten the length of an outbreak and manage any pain associated with lesions. Here are some treatment options:

• Acyclovir
• Valacyclovir
• Famciclovir

All three drugs work pretty much the same, and one study showed that all of them tend to speed up healing time by about one to two days. But the key is to start treatment as soon as you notice signs of an outbreak.

Treatment is most effective when it’s taken within 48 hours of first symptoms, which is a tingling, itching, or painful sensation on the site of the infection.

Many individuals with herpes are prescribed antiviral drugs to take during outbreaks. This treatment can shorten the outbreak's duration and should commence at the first sign of prodromal symptoms or within one day of lesion development.

Various drug regimens, involving one of the three currently approved antiviral drugs for herpes, are recommended for this treatment.

For those who have frequent herpes outbreaks or significant symptoms during an outbreak, healthcare providers may suggest daily antiviral medication to prevent outbreaks, known as suppressive therapy.

Taking the medication daily can also reduce the risk of transmitting herpes to a sexual partner, even for individuals who don't experience visible symptoms or outbreaks, according to the CDC.

Watch for the symptoms of outbreaks and treat them promptly.

If you see the symptoms of a genital herpes recurrence, treat them promptly. This may help minimize the length of the outbreak and may make it less severe. The symptoms of an outbreak may include: herpetic lesions, fever, body aches, swollen lymph nodes, and headache.

Engage in Open Communication with Any Sexual Partner

If you're living with herpes, it's crucial to maintain open and honest communication with any sexual partners. Telling past and current partners that you have an STI isn’t always easy. However, having an open and honest conversation about your diagnosis can help prevent you from spreading it and give your partner some peace of mind.

Because herpes is so common, you might even learn that your partner has it, too. Discussing your condition not only promotes the use of barrier protection and the avoidance of sexual activity during outbreaks but also plays a significant role in establishing shared values and priorities concerning herpes.

Effective communication goes beyond simply coordinating precautions; it involves a mutual understanding of how both partners view and prioritize their approach to living with herpes.

Prioritize Your Mental Health

Being diagnosed with herpes can cause stress, anxiety, and other feelings that can sometimes be difficult to deal with. If you’ve recently been diagnosed with HSV and are feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone. It's OK to take time to process your emotions and reach out for help if needed.

You may want to find a support group for people living with herpes. Joining a support group will accomplish two things:

1. Build your knowledge of what it’s like to live with herpes
2. Show you that you’re not alone in your experience with herpes

You get a safe space to express your feelings, be it for guilt, shame, frustration, anger, anxiety, or sadness. In a herpes support group, you get to share the impact living with the virus has had on your life amongst people who relater and empathize with you.

Breaking the Stigma

The stigma surrounding herpes is deeply rooted in cultural, social, and historical influences. Misinformation about the virus often perpetuates myths and misconceptions, contributing to fear and judgment.

Several factors contribute to why some people may do not want to have sex with people with herpes. It's important to note that these concerns are often rooted in misconceptions and lack of accurate information about the virus. Common concerns include:

• Fear of Infection: One of the primary concerns is the fear of contracting herpes. Many people are unaware of the transmission risks and preventive measures that can be taken to reduce the likelihood of transmission.
• Misinformation: Misinformation and myths about the virus. People may believe that herpes is more contagious or severe than it actually is.
• Emotional Impact: There may be concerns about the emotional impact of being in a relationship with someone who has herpes. This could include worries about the potential for emotional distress, stigma, or the impact on the relationship itself.
• Sexuality and morality: Sexuality and morality play a role in perpetuating the stigma. Herpes, being a sexually transmitted infection, is sometimes associated with notions of promiscuity or immoral behavior, adding a layer of judgment to the stigma.

While some people may not want to have sex with you due to deep-seated stigmas and misconceptions, it is crucial to challenge these biases through education, awareness, and open communication.

Lead a healthy lifestyle

Leading a healthy lifestyle with herpes involves managing the condition effectively, reducing the frequency and severity of outbreaks, and promoting overall well-being. Here are some tips for maintaining a healthy lifestyle if you have herpes:

• Healthy Diet: Eat a well-balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins. A healthy diet can support your immune system.
• Regular Exercise: Engage in regular physical activity to boost your overall health and immune system. Choose activities you enjoy, such as walking, swimming, or yoga.
• Adequate Sleep: Ensure you get enough sleep to support your immune system. Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night.
• Manage Stress: Stress can trigger herpes outbreaks. Practice stress-reducing techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga.
• Stay Hydrated: Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated. Proper hydration is essential for overall health and can support your immune system.
• Avoid Triggers: Identify and avoid factors that trigger herpes outbreaks for you. These may include certain foods, excessive sunlight exposure, or stressors.

Living with herpes can be emotionally challenging. Seek support from friends, other people with herpes, family, or a therapist to help you cope with any emotional or psychological impact.